Hit Me with Your Best Merb

Here's an interesting problem.

You're driving on a curvy, hilly road in which the speed limit is 55mph.  Getting caught speeding much over 60mph is not only probable, but bad for you (since you've been caught doing so before).

You're behind another driver who is going 60mph in the passing zones and 50mph in the non-passing zones.  (I'm convinced this was some sort of game)

Do you pass?

How to Handle the Fly on the Wall

Listening with your full attention is a very important thing to do in order to build relationships and remain credible.  That said, we can't always execute in that way.  Our mind gets in the way.  Other thoughts creep in...

"What is the person in front of me about to say?"
"Did I lock my car door?"
"Is my boss going to rip me a new one when we meet this afternoon?"
"I've got to finish this presentation."

These are our flies.  Killing them is very challenging (and potentially time consuming...have you ever chased a fly?).  But when they exist on the walls of our mind you must let them out before you can focus.

How do we let the flies out?  Address them when you can.  Either interrupt the person talking to you (assuming it's a casual conversation or relationship) and state, "I'm sorry, I'm a little distracted because I've got a big meeting I need to prepare for." Then suggest that you either talk later because you want to give them your full attention or decide to make it short.  If this is not an option you must practice "fly ignoring" - just plain resolve to listen (this IS in your control) and either decide on a time to address the fly or decide that you must cohabitate.

Now, you don't want colonies of flies.  If they begin to take over start scheduling time with yourself to address these things.  It does not matter how busy you are.  Your sanity and your relationships depend on it.

What is Luck?

Luck is where preparation meets opportunity.

There are a number of people who have used a variation of this phrase...so I'll just say that it isn't mine, but I believe it wholeheartedly.

Years ago, I was talking with an executive from a multi-billion dollar company and I asked him how he got where he is today.  "I'm just lucky." he said.  I was never quite comfortable with that statement.  Obviously, he wasn't sitting on the couch, watching TV, eating Cheetos when the phone rang and the caller said, "Hey you lucky guy.  Wanna be an executive?"  He had to work...and work...and work.  And finally, when the opportunity arose his work paid off.

Keep this in mind.  You may not control the opportunities, but you have full control over your preparation. Thus you have more control over how lucky you are then you may realize.

The Lifecycle of a Consumer

I received a catalog the other day (yes, I still get catalogs...love them) that I hadn't seen in 10-15 years.  It was a catalog that, long ago, I would fawn over.  Every page contained products that I wanted to own.  Not just wanted....LONGED for.

How did I feel when I looked over the catalog today?  Old.  None of the products really appealed to me, though I found them interesting.  It made me think....what is the lifecycle of a single consumer?  How long can you typically hold their loyalty, preference, etc.? 

My Beliefs

I don't believe in never or impossible.  Only time, effort, and innovation.

Embracing the "When"

Relationship Building Rule #1

There is no such thing as "can't"
There is only "when"

Constantly telling a customer, partner, or anyone for that matter "no" will only provide you with negative equity.  If you provide alternatives to what is being asked you are more likely to build respect - which is the foundation for a healthy relationship.  This is applicable whether you are working with a customer that wants a specific deliverable or your own child asking to go to watch TV.

Negotiating conditions and then meeting those expectations is a wonderful thing.

The Interesting Thing About Mobile

This is likely old news, but I was thinking.  In a conference I attended last week someone stated that the younger generation actually feels it is "rude" to call someone.  Instead they use mobile devices to text, chat, etc. as a standard mode of communication.  It was also mentioned that the average teenager sends approximately 3000 texts a month.  It occurred to me that communication is up while "face time" is down.  I already knew of the latter, but it never actually dawned on me that we might actually be communicating more.  And I mean actually communicating.  Not spamming or the like. 

Success is a Happy Customer

Sometimes we lose sight of this.

I was once part of a project in which we charged ahead to deliver what we felt was valuable and in respect of the customer's time, we only involved them "as needed".  The project was a failure.  Every little thing that was wrong came out, complaints were abundant.  So we tried again.  This time, the customer was a partner in our delivery.  Sure, our resource requirements went WAY up, but in the end we all won.  And the proof of that was not that we finished, but when a problem was found the customer worked through it with his/her "partners" instead of complaining.

Both the service and the served have needs.  The best outcome is derived from working together to agree on what you jointly need.

When is Change Management NOT important?

I keep talking to people about various projects they are embarking on and the same message comes through loud and clear, "Change management is critical."  I hear it so often that I wonder - when is it not?

I realize there are times in which it may be less critical, but I'm starting to think that either I'm taking on some serious projects or everyone is resistant to change....how about both?

Just Another Merb Moment

So I'm at a conference, listening to the speaker in a room of 100+ people.  In spite of the size of the group all you hear is the speaker.  He makes a joke....a distinct (and loud) "HA!" escapes my mouth.  I'm the only one.

Merb.

Baby Steps

Insert cliche here.

Change is constant, but change can be managed.  The goal may be visible but you have to guide people to it at a pace they can maintain rather than pulling them after they've run out of breath.

Know Your Customer

Sure, you've heard it before, but I see time and time again people thinking, "I don't have a customer."  You ALWAYS have a customer.  Sometimes it's you.

In addition, there is confusion between knowing what the customer wants and doing the right thing.  I see this in IT all the time.  These are not mutually exclusive.  I always fall back on the analogy of a house.  You can build a structurally perfect house that looks, well, like a house and you can build a beautiful house that maybe isn't so perfect.  Guess what?  There will be a market for the first house, BUT there will be a "buzz" about the second.  More often than not, people fall in love with what they can see....what looks good on them.  So making the right choice means making the best balanced choice.  A good looking home with a sound foundation.  The result:

Short-term: People want to buy the house, people want their own homes to resemble this house, people feel good about themselves because they have that house


Long-term: The love for the home continues, it still stands, modest repairs/updates can be made the keep the owners happy for years to come

Don't build a house that no one wants to live in.

Welcome to Lasagna

I guess if I was paying attention (or possibly allowing my brain the time to actually process rational thought) I would have realized that the sign at the airport did NOT say this.  It said "Welcome to LaGuardia."

Did I get unreasonably excited about my location for just a split second?  I'm not telling.

Merb.

Be Brief, Be Bright, Be Gone

Since mantras have been my theme I guess I should share my third and last.  I cannot take credit for this one either.  There was a gentleman whom I did not work with that passed this on through my organization and I have adopted it (though only others can tell you about the quality of my execution).

If ever in doubt of how to communicate, let this be your guide.

Do Nothing, Say Nothing, Be Nothing

This is a revision of an Elbert Hubbard quote, "To avoid criticism do nothing, say nothing, be nothing."  I've dropped the first three words to create a personal mantra.

Why have I adopted this?  Have you ever been bothered by something you didn't say?  Sure, I get upset about things I have said, but the ones that I haven't seem to linger in my guilt repository much longer.  Because of this, though, I am often the only one willing to publicly voice my thoughts and concerns - even if I am not the only one thinking them.  Yes, this has put me in difficult personal situations at times, but I would not change it.  Through this, I have influenced my life and I hold pride in that.

I put out there to everyone....Do Nothing, Say Nothing, Be Nothing.  Apply it intelligently and kindly (as required), but apply it.